Grandpas Make the World a Better Place by Tony Kubica

Last week, I had coffee with my longtime friend, Tony Kubica. We share many things and among them our love of grandchildren. Tony has a blog thereof; Grandpa’s Tales. It’s good. I have encouraged Tony to keep going with it and asked for one of his postings. Here it is.

Grandpas (and Grandma’s too) are very special people in the lives of our grandchildren. Too often Grandmas seem to get this so much better than Grandpas. And that’s sad, because we Grandpas, too, are really special in our grandchildren’s world. We have so much to offer.
Too often we see the world through the eyes of a skeptic. We think we need to make them tough to survive in a tough world. But it’s not skepticism, cynicism, or “facing up to the real world”, that we are here to teach. We are here to teach them something different, something so much more, something precious.

Courtesy of Shutterstock

As a Grandpa, here’s what I believe we are here to do:
– Bring them moments of happiness
– Love them unconditionally
– Always give them hope
– Help them believe in themselves and their possibilities
– Listen to them (without judgment) when they want to talk
– Help them understand there are winners and losers, but it’s in the moment – not
for all time.
– Be a role model in their lives by what you do and what you stand for
– Help them understand that when they think they have given their all, they should
give a little more.
– Play with them, laugh with them, cry with them
– Teach them the power of humility
– Have them know that they can make the world a better place
Be there for them, and you will live on for eternity. They will pass your gift on to their children and grandchildren. And the world will be a better place.

Thank you, Tony. Beautiful.

By | 2018-12-27T17:20:14+00:00 January 10th, 2019|Family, Grandchildren|18 Comments

18 Comments

  1. Peter Voccio JR January 10, 2019 at 2:24 pm - Reply

    Ed,

    A beautiful blog by Tony, so well said and all so true, a great Grandpa for sure. We have three granddaughters ages 16,17 and 20. Our oldest is in her second year of college and two in high school. We keep close with them ever since infancy through all the trials and tribune with many, many hugs. The love and learning go both ways, more to us. They keep us young at heart!

    • Ed January 10, 2019 at 2:29 pm - Reply

      Yes, Peter. I loved it also. Just had two grandsons accepted to college … one to PC, one to U of Chicago.

  2. Ken Arnold January 14, 2019 at 2:24 pm - Reply

    As always, Tony’s piece is thoughtful, insightful, and articulate. Thanks to both of you for sharing it. We have twelve grandchildren, and we do everything we are able in order to have a special relationship with each one.

    • Ed January 14, 2019 at 2:35 pm - Reply

      Thanks, Ken. I am sure Tony will be pleased that you ‘weighed in’.
      Yes, grandchildren are treasures. We have ten … our first two just accepted to college.

  3. Anthony J. (Tony) Agostinelli January 14, 2019 at 3:00 pm - Reply

    Add to the list, tell them stories about::
    — the old country if you were born there or visited your relatives there
    — growing up in the neighborhood
    — going off to college and beyond
    — being in the military (war stories, sea stories, air stories, etc.)
    — courting grandma and living with and loving her and the growing family
    — their own parents, aunts and uncles
    — show photos, films or other digital representations of your whole life and connect stories to them

    They will be enriched by the fullness of your and your wife’s lives,

    • Ed January 14, 2019 at 5:28 pm - Reply

      Yes, Tony! Yes indeed. Thanks.

    • Natalie L McKenna January 15, 2019 at 4:16 am - Reply

      Oh yes! Telling them about your life in the past, as a child-teenager-young adult, motherhood or fatherhood, etc., etc.
      also pictures are very important too. Without pictures we would never be able to show them their forebears. A picture tells a thousand words!

      • Ed January 15, 2019 at 11:48 am - Reply

        I so agree, Natalie. Grandparents … Write your story for your grandchildren if for no one else

        • Natalie L McKenna January 16, 2019 at 1:03 am - Reply

          Amen!

  4. Joe Kernan January 14, 2019 at 4:50 pm - Reply

    Parents say “No” and grandparents say “Yes” and that’s why we love grandparents. It’s a relief to be loved without doing chores or homework or trying to please everyone. I wish my grandparents were still around to let me retreat from this big, frightening world. Keep up the good work, Tony.

  5. Ellen Cyronak January 14, 2019 at 5:14 pm - Reply

    Have one grandchild 17 last week. Miss her so much. Moved away 3 years ago to Georgia. Hate that so much. My daughter did not want that to happen. She passed away 6 years ago Miss them both very much Loved doing everything for her plus much more.

    • Ed January 14, 2019 at 5:27 pm - Reply

      Oh dear, Ellen. Sorry to hear. You need an extended stay in Georgia where you can stock up on hugs.

  6. Joe Augustine January 14, 2019 at 5:19 pm - Reply

    Dr. Ed,
    Glad to hear you and Tony Kubica are longtime friends. He’s a good guy. I have good memories of Tony when we all worked together at Rhode Island Hospital in the 70’s and 80’s. Please remember me to him when you’re in touch again. Thanks

    • Ed January 14, 2019 at 5:26 pm - Reply

      Thanks, Joe. Tony will see your comments, and I know he will be pleased. Thank you.

  7. Patricia Treat January 14, 2019 at 10:42 pm - Reply

    Thank you for sharing Tony’s words of wisdom!!
    I’d like to add one “add on;” Take the grandchildren fishing….it’s your special time with them and they will
    Always remember this time …it can be from shore or on a boat . Being a grandparent is the BEST!!

    • Ed January 14, 2019 at 10:46 pm - Reply

      Thanks, Patti. I’ll bet Tony has done it or is about to. Great suggestion

  8. Tony Kubica January 22, 2019 at 2:12 pm - Reply

    Thank you for the kind and supportive comments and suggestions. I very much appreciate them and each of you for taking the time to make them. In your comments, you have given me ideas on where I can take GrandpaTales. There are stories to tell: of my early years in Bridgeport, Ct;; the move to Stratford, CT when I was five; early memories of my Grandma; the mystery surrounding my father’s father (something my father’s family would not talk about – so our young imaginations made up wild stories); the penny candy store on the ground floor of Grandma’s tenement house; going to New York City every year with my parents, and the time I thought a doubleheader was a game played by baseball players with two heads – seriously..

    Thank you.

    • Ed January 22, 2019 at 2:39 pm - Reply

      Good stuff, Tony. I would love for you to start with the doubleheader story. Two heads are better than one … Sorry!
      So much fodder here. Go!

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