In a writing class with Joan Lee Hunter, we were asked to jot our thoughts as we listened to a calming musical segment. Here is what came out. I cannot remember the piece. You can tell that it didn’t matter.

Random were my thoughts. Here goes.

There is a rhythm I like in the opening, a rhythm that defines what I like— order, system, everything in its place. Quiet is good. Quiet sometimes helps you make decisions, but then again, do you want to make a decision? Decision making has ruled your life.

Maybe its time to relax, to cocoon yourself by just listening. Have you listened? There is much you haven’t seen, much to see, much to learn. I need more time. The music ushers in a sense of infirmity that you can go on forever listening to this, that it will put you in a safe place.

Maybe I’ve never heard this before. Maybe I’ve heard it often. Maybe I could listen  better.

You get to a point when you’re running…. when a good feeling overcomes the pain you experienced when you started. It’s a good sweat in a loose shirt. It’s a rhythmic breath in the icy cold. It’s a soft feeling in deep muscles. It could go on forever. Is this the zone? If the zone means peace without tough decisions, then the sweat is good. It’s lickable. There is no one around. You can take the headphones off because you don’t need to hear anything.

I hear my heart. It’s reliable. It’s predictable. I can depend on it. Then I make it. I’m home. What a wonderful ache….a whole bunch of them. It’s so much easier to sleep now. Once I stopped to listen to the hum of the cicadas. Once I smelled the ozone after a summer rain. Is that what the smell was?

Sweat reminds me of that summer job in the boiling machine shop where pieces of hot metal flew off and stuck to my chest. That started the dance of the machines. They rippled like the middle of the song. Pretty soon it would be time for a coffee break. Sit. Relax. Take a breath. Watch the clock.

It’s a good feeling to know what you’ve accomplished.

I’ve heard this song before, but never has it been played. The cadence peaks, then wanes to a still water, no ripples. I like it. It’ a pond in my youth. I walked to it on a hot summer day to jump in and cool. No ripples.

Now I’m listening. Why has it taken so long?

© 2015